There are tons of beautifully designed Pokemon, but in this list we look at the very worst.
The world of Pokemon is incredible. An electric rodent? Inspired. A turtle that can use water as an attack? Sweet. A fire salamander? Excellent. A dinosaur with a flower bulb on its back? Uh, okay, maybe it’s not all incredible.
There are at least 100 Pokemon that we think are incredibly designed and definitively iconic in 2022, but there are also a lot of stinkers. In this list, we run through just ten of the very worst Pokemon ever designed, and trust us, it can get pretty bad.
Is Paras the worst Pokemon of all time? It feels wrong to say something so harsh about a creature from the very first – and greatest – Pokemon generation, but unfortunately Paras has never had anything to love.
It’s an ugly creature, it has terrible statistics and it’s incredibly common… It just sucks. Sorry Paras, you are useless. This item may have been influenced by how annoying the creature is in Pokemon Legends: Arceus, but the point still stands.
There’s something about Bruxish that reminds us of your aunt who was drunk at a family gathering and tried to give you a big kiss on the cheek – and nothing you can do will help you escape. Bruxish’s lips, teeth, shape and indeed, vibe, are all wrong. They insult me mentally. We wouldn’t even make it to Pokédex completion.
Did anyone like Zubat? Most Gen 1 players certainly didn’t, thanks to how often it would appeal to you in a cave. So how did Game Freak decide to top that creature? Another bat with a name that sounds almost exactly the same. unbelievable.
Worse yet, Woobat doesn’t even have a cool evolution like Zubat does. Crobat looks great, but Swoobat? Disgusting even if it has a heart shaped nose. Woobat and Swoobat are the worst bat Pokemon yet.
We’ve all had awkward teenage phases, but Palpitoad takes the cake. Palpitoad sits between Tympole and Seismitoad, but while those two creatures are pretty cool, Palpitoad is… yikes. This creature has legs, but now arms, disgusting growths sticking out of its head, and a silly grin that frankly pisses us off.
This looks like a deconstruction of Poliwag, only horrific. No thank you.
Honestly, at least we can see what they were trying to do here. Swalot is a big heap of poison, like Muk, but cute, with catfish-like whiskers. The problem is, it’s not cute, and we can only imagine what the thing smells like. Just a notch below the living pile of garbage Garbodor is in the Pokemon rankings.
This is a pigeon. Frankly, we don’t know what more to say. This is a pigeon. Just like a regular pigeon really, the kind that tries to steal your chips and ice cream while you’re in the park.
Somehow this is a step back from Pidgey, and we weren’t sure if that was really possible. Sure, you could argue that Pidove isn’t an abomination, which is definitely a plus, but if you’re training mystical creatures – some of which are revered as gods – then walking around with a dove will feel a bit disappointing.
We can and will make fun of a simple pigeon or a bunch of sludge entering the Pokédex, but there’s something much worse about a giant snowflake – and we don’t mean that in the hyperbolic online sense, it’s literally a big ice crystal.
That said, maybe being called a cryogonal is a much worse insult if you’re feeling sensitive on social media. Anyway, snowflakes are beautiful. Cryogonal is… well, it exists.
This is an ice cream. Yes, Cryogonal has competition for the worst ice type title. Fortunately, it is at least a luxury ice cream, with that double ice swirl on top. The problem is, it’s very ridiculous.
It even has two stupid smiling faces staring at both globs of delicious ice cream. It may look appetizing, but there’s something utterly nasty lurking behind the eyes of this cone. Probably coffee flavor.
We would once have argued that Voltorb and Magnemite were ridiculous designs. Now we lean towards the “iconic simplicity” angle. Klinklang is neither simple nor iconic, and it is utterly disappointing. Like Magnemite, this is a set of gears with eyes, which rotate together in place.
But those gears don’t do anything. It’s just as useful as a GOOGOL:1 gear reducer – search online if you want to know exactly how useful that is, but for those feeling lazy, it’s not helpful in the least, just good to use as an example. In this case, it is an example of a useless Pokemon.
This is essentially a person. Hitmonchan is a bit odd, isn’t it, but Sawk? It’s a guy in a little karate gi. For all I know, this could be a guy in a suit. And I should have this thing on my team? No.
Written by Cian Maher and Dave Aubrey on behalf of GLHF†