Tom’s Great Sacrifice With Shredded Movie

It’s official: Tom Hanks has made a career-first misstep. This is why we must give him credit for the sacrifice.

Watching a Baz Luhrmann film is like getting in the car in the morning, turning on the ignition and blasting the stereo out of the speakers at full volume.

The only difference is that you don’t expect it in the car. With Baz, enter the theater and prepare for the attack. But even then, you are still amazed at the shock to the senses.

The groundbreaking Australian director goes big. From Romeo and Juliet until Moulin Rouge and The Great Gatsby – if it can’t be described as a spectacle, then Baz isn’t interested.

The same goes for his latest bedazzled offering: the Elvis biopic.

The reviews are mixed. Many critics have dismissed the film as messy and unfocused. And that’s probably because the screenplay had about as many co-writers as a Beyonce song.

“It’s unrestrained, exuberant, demanding, aggressive, generous, luxurious, raging, explosive and exhausting – and sometimes all at the same time,” news.com.au film critic Wenlei Ma wrote:

“There are aspects of Elvis that’s cinematic mastery and there are other parts that are bilge. It’s a jumble of contradictions and also… just a jumble.”

The end product is a lot. If you go to the cinema for almost three hours, you will probably find glitter on your skin for weeks to come.

“Before you leave the house, look in the mirror and take one thing off,” Coco Chanel once said.

If the French fashion designer were still alive, Baz wouldn’t be friends with her. He would probably protest her quest for simplicity by glitter-bombing her house.

When it comes to Baz’s movies, he’s more of a Versace guy. More is more is more. Before you leave the house, look in the mirror and then put on a top hat. If he could wear seven pairs of shoes at once, he would.

For once, it would be great to see Baz working within the confines of a standard 90-minute JLo romcom. No bells and whistles. No glitter budget. No elaborate dance sequences.

Even then he would try to push the envelope.

“Boss! JLo plays a hapless New York publicist looking for love in Manhattan – there’s no reason to let her fly on a trapeze!’

Movies about pop culture icons always run the risk of being ridiculous caricatures. Elvis Presley – with his pout and his costumes – is seen as more of a character than a person. Someone to dress up as for Halloween.

But swoony American actor Austin Butler’s well-thought-out performance as the King of Rock and Roll prevents the biopic from becoming a gaudy pageant without substance. Maybe that’s why the movie’s biggest blindside stings so much.

Ladies and gentlemen, it comes with great regret to report that Tom Hanks is starring in a career-worst role.

Tom – known worldwide as The Nicest Guy In Hollywood – is the stinker in Elvis. He plays Colonel Tom Parker, a manipulative manager who takes the young singer under his wing and exploits him as an evil puppeteer.

The role of shady antagonist quickly changes to Mojo Jojo – the villain from The Powerpuff Girls

Tom wears a thick suit and a rubber face. That is immediately a red flag. Rolling with thick suits is always dangerous. It could get you an Oscar. Or you could just look like a perk in the Nutty Professor.

It doesn’t help that Tom also talks in a bizarre unrecognizable accent all the time.

†[It’s] arguably the least attractive achievement of his career,” The Hollywood Reporter wrote.

The real kick to the guts is this dud role that got Tom caught Covid.

Production for Elvis had just started on the Gold Coast in early 2020 when a mysterious pandemic began to threaten the world. By April, Tom and his wife Rita Wilson had tested positive for Covid and were the first globally recognized people to get the virus that we knew little about.

Proving his status as The Nicest Guy In Hollywood, he then volunteered himself for scientific research to help develop a vaccine.

“Many of the questions [are] what do we do now? Is there anything we can do? And in fact we just found out that we do have the antibodies with us,” he told NPRs Wait Wait…Don’t tell me! podcast shortly after recovery.

“Not only were we approached, we also said, ‘Do you want our blood? Can we give plasma?’”

Rather than sledding his performance, we should respect the sacrifice Tom Hanks made by accepting this lemon of a roll.

What we saw was the butterfly effect in the game.

If Tom Hanks catches Covid on the Gold Coast playing Mojo Jojo in Baz Luhrmann’s OTT Elvis biopic, it could change the outcome of a global pandemic.

Twitter, Facebook: @hellojamesweir

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